THE DESCRIPTION OF A Salamander. Out of Pliny Nat. Hist. L. 10. C. 67 and L. 29 C. 4. Jonathan Swift Alexander Huber Editor Bodleian Libraries, University of Oxford
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Oxford This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License. T39454 Swift, Jonathan, 1667-1745. Miscellanies in PROSE and VERSE [poems only]. London printed for John Morphew, near Stationers Hall 1711 pp. 372-376. [14],416p.; 8⁰.

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THE DESCRIPTION OF A Salamander . Out of Pliny Nat. Hist. L. 10. C. 67 and L. 29 C. 4. Anno. 1705. As Mastive Dogs in Modern Phrase are Call'd Pompey , Scipio and Cæsar ; As Pies and Daws are often stil'd With Christian Nick-names like a Child ; As we say , Monsieur , to an Ape Without offence to Human Shape : So men have got from Bird and Brute Names that would best their Natures suit : The Lyon , Eagle , Fox and Bear Were Hero's Titles heretofore , Bestow'd as Hi'roglyphicks fit T'express their Valor , Strength or Wit . For , what is understood by Fame Beside the getting of a Name ? But e're since Men invented Guns , A different way their Fancy runs ; To paint a Hero , we enquire For something that will conquer Fire , Would you describe Turenne or Trump Think of a Bucket or a Pump . Are these too low ? — then find out grander , Call my Lord C— a Salamander . 'Tis well . — But since we live among Detractors with an evil Tongue , Who may object against the Term , Pliny shall prove what we affirm : Pliny shall prove , and we'll apply , And I'll be judg'd by standers-by . FIRST then , our Author has defin'd This Reptil , of the Serpent kind , With gawdy Coat , and shining Train , But loathsom Spots his Body stain : Out from some Hole obscure he flies When Rains descend , and Tempests rise , Till the Sun clears the Air ; and then Crawls back neglected to his Den . SO when the War has rais'd a Storm I've seen a Snake in human Form , All stain'd with Infamy and Vice , Leap from the Dunghill in a trice , Burnish and make a gaudy show , Become a General , Peer and Beau , Till Peace hath made the Sky serene , Then shrink into it's Hole again . All this we grant — why , then look yonder Sure that must be a Salamander ! FARTHER , we are by Pliny told This Serpent is extreamly cold , So cold , that put it in the Fire , 'Twill make the very Flames expire , Beside , it Spues a filthy Froth , ( Whether thro' Rage or Love , or both ) Of Matter Purulent and white Which happ'ning on the Skin to light , And there corrupting to a Wound Spreads Leprosy and Baldness round . SO have I seen a batter'd Beau By Age and Claps grown cold as Snow , Whose Breath or Touch , where e'er he came , Blew out Love's Torch or chill'd the Flame : And should some Nymph who ne'er was cruel , Like Carleton cheap , or fam'd Duruel , Receive the Filth which he ejects , She soon would find , the same Effects , Her tainted Carcase to pursue , As from the Salamander's Spue ; A dismal shedding of her Locks And , if no Leprosy , a Pox . Then I'll appeal to each By-stander , Whether this ben't a Salamander .