PROLOGUE to COMUS, Perform'd for the Benefit of the General Hospital at BATH, 1756. John Hoadly Alexander Huber Editor Bodleian Libraries, University of Oxford
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Eighteenth-Century Poetry Archive
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Oxford This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License. T131163 K104099.005 Dodsley, Robert, 1703-1764. A Collection of Poems in Six Volumes. By Several Hands. Vol. V. London printed by J. Hughs, for R. and J. Dodsley 1763 [1st ed. 1758] pp. 283-285. 6v.: music; 8⁰.

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PROLOGUE to COMUS , Perform'd for the Benefit of the General Hospital at BATH , 1756. By the Same . Spoken by Miss MORRISON , in the Character of a Lady of Fashion . She enters with a Number of Tickets in her Hand . WELL , I've been beating up for volunteers , But find that — charity has got no ears . I first attack'd a colonel of the guards — Sir , charity — consider its rewards . With healing hand the saddest sores it skins , And covers — oh ! — a multitude of sins . He swore , the world was welcome to his thoughts : 'Twas damn'd hypocrisy to hide one's faults ; And with that sin his conscience ne'er was twitted — The only one he never had committed . Next , to my knight I plead . He — shook his head ; Complain'd the stocks were low — and trade was dead . In these Bath-charities a tax he'd found More heavy than — four shillings in the pound . What with the play-house , hospital , and abbey , A man was strip'd — unless he'd look quite shabby . Then such a train , and such expence to fit ! My lady , all the brats , and cousin Kit — He'd steal , himself — perhaps — into the pit . Old lady Slipslop , at her morning cards , Vows that all works of genus she regards ; Raffles for Chinese Gods , card-houses , shells , Nor grudges to the music , or the bells , But has a strange antiquity to nasty ospitels . I hope your lordship — then my lord replies — No doubt , the governors are — very wise ; But , for the play , he — wonder'd at their choice . In Milton's days such stuff might be the taste , But faith ! he thought it was damn'd dull and chaste . Then swears , he to the charity is hearty , But can't , in honour , break his evening party . When to the gouty alderman I sued , The nasty fellow , ( 'gad ! ) was downright rude . Is begging grown the fashion , with a pox ! The mayor should set such housewives in the stocks . Give you a guinea ! z—ds ! replied the beast , 'Twou'd buy a ticket for a turtle-feast . Think what a guinea-a-head might set before ye — Sir — mullet — turbot — and a grand John Dorey , I'll never give a groat , as I'm a sinner , Unless they gather 't in a dish , at dinner . I trust , by art and more polite address , You fairer advocates met more success ; And not a man compassion's cause withstood , When beauty pleaded for such general good .