ADVICE
to
a
LADY
.
By
the
Same
.
1731.
THE
counsels
of
a
friend
,
Belinda
,
hear
,
Too
roughly
kind
to
please
a
Lady's
ear
,
Unlike
the
flatt'ries
of
a
lover's
pen
,
Such
truths
as
women
seldom
learn
from
men
.
Nor
think
I
praise
you
ill
,
when
thus
I
shew
What
female
Vanity
might
fear
to
know
:
Some
merit's
mine
,
to
dare
to
be
sincere
,
But
greater
your's
,
sincerity
to
bear
.
Hard
is
the
fortune
that
your
sex
attends
;
Women
,
like
Princes
,
find
few
real
friends
:
All
who
approach
them
their
own
ends
pursue
:
Lovers
and
ministers
are
seldom
true
.
Hence
oft
from
Reason
heedless
Beauty
strays
,
And
the
most
trusted
Guide
the
most
betrays
:
Hence
by
fond
dreams
of
fancy'd
pow'r
amus'd
,
When
most
you
tyrannize
you're
most
abus'd
.
What
is
your
sex's
earliest
,
latest
care
,
Your
heart's
supreme
ambition
?
To
be
fair
:
For
this
the
toilet
ev'ry
thought
employs
,
Hence
all
the
toils
of
dress
,
and
all
the
joys
:
For
this
,
hands
,
lips
,
and
eyes
are
put
to
school
,
And
each
instructive
feature
has
its
rule
;
And
yet
how
few
have
learnt
,
when
this
is
giv'n
.
Not
to
disgrace
the
partial
boon
of
heav'n
?
How
few
with
all
their
pride
of
form
can
move
?
How
few
are
lovely
,
that
were
made
for
love
?
Do
you
,
my
fair
,
endeavour
to
possess
An
elegance
of
mind
as
well
as
dress
;
Be
that
your
ornament
,
and
know
to
please
By
grateful
Nature's
unaffected
ease
.
Nor
make
to
dang'rous
Wit
a
vain
pretence
,
But
wisely
rest
content
with
modest
Sense
;
For
wit
,
like
wine
,
intoxicates
the
brain
,
Too
strong
for
feeble
women
to
sustain
;
Of
those
who
claim
it
,
more
than
half
have
none
,
And
half
of
those
who
have
it
,
are
undone
.
Be
still
superior
to
your
sex's
arts
,
Nor
think
Dishonesty
a
proof
of
Parts
;
For
you
the
plainest
is
the
wisest
rule
,
A
CUNNING
WOMAN
is
a
KNAVISH
FOOL
.
Be
good
yourself
,
nor
think
another's
shame
Can
raise
your
merit
,
or
adorn
your
fame
.
Prudes
rail
at
whores
,
as
statesmen
in
disgrace
At
ministers
,
because
they
wish
their
place
.
Virtue
is
amiable
,
mild
,
serene
,
Without
all
beauty
,
and
all
peace
within
:
The
honour
of
a
prude
is
rage
and
storm
,
'Tis
ugliness
in
its
most
frightful
form
:
Fiercely
it
stands
defying
gods
and
men
,
As
fiery
monsters
guard
a
giant's
den
.
Seek
to
be
good
,
but
aim
not
to
be
great
:
A
woman's
noblest
station
is
Retreat
;
Her
fairest
virtues
fly
from
publick
sight
,
Domestick
worth
,
that
shuns
too
strong
a
light
.
To
rougher
man
Ambition's
task
resign
:
'Tis
ours
in
Senates
or
in
Courts
to
shine
,
To
labour
for
a
sunk
corrupted
state
,
Or
dare
the
rage
of
envy
,
and
be
great
.
One
only
care
your
gentle
breasts
should
move
,
Th'
important
business
of
your
life
is
Love
:
To
this
great
point
direct
your
constant
aim
,
This
makes
your
Happiness
,
and
this
your
Fame
.
Be
never
cool
reserve
with
passion
join'd
;
With
caution
chuse
;
but
then
be
fondly
kind
.
The
selfish
heart
,
that
but
by
halves
is
giv'n
,
Shall
find
no
place
in
Love's
delightful
heav'n
;
Here
sweet
extremes
alone
can
truly
bless
,
The
virtue
of
a
lover
is
excess
.
A
maid
unask'd
may
own
a
well-plac'd
flame
,
Not
loving
first
,
but
loving
wrong
is
shame
.
Contemn
the
little
pride
of
giving
pain
,
Nor
think
that
conquest
justifies
disdain
;
Short
is
the
period
of
insulting
Pow'r
;
Offended
Cupid
finds
his
vengeful
hour
,
Soon
will
resume
the
empire
which
he
gave
,
And
soon
the
Tyrant
shall
become
the
Slave
.
Blest
is
the
maid
,
and
worthy
to
be
blest
,
Whose
soul
,
entire
by
him
she
loves
possess'd
,
Feels
ev'ry
vanity
in
fondness
lost
,
And
asks
no
pow'r
,
but
that
of
pleasing
most
:
Her's
is
the
bliss
in
just
return
to
prove
The
honest
warmth
of
undissembled
Love
;
For
her
,
inconstant
man
might
cease
to
range
,
And
Gratitude
forbid
Desire
to
change
.
But
lest
harsh
Care
the
lover's
peace
destroy
,
And
roughly
blight
the
tender
buds
of
joy
,
Let
Reason
teach
what
Passion
fain
would
hide
,
That
Hymen's
bands
by
Prudence
should
be
ty'd
,
Venus
in
vain
the
wedded
pair
would
crown
,
If
angry
Fortune
on
their
union
frown
:
Soon
will
the
flatt'ring
dream
of
bliss
be
o'er
,
And
cloy'd
imagination
cheat
no
more
.
Then
waking
to
the
sense
of
lasting
pain
,
With
mutual
tears
the
nuptial
couch
they
stain
;
And
that
fond
love
,
which
should
afford
relief
,
Does
but
increase
the
anguish
of
their
grief
;
While
both
could
easier
their
own
sorrows
bear
,
Than
the
sad
knowledge
of
each
other's
care
.
Yet
may
you
rather
feel
that
virtuous
pain
,
Than
sell
your
violated
charms
for
gain
;
Than
wed
the
wretch
whom
you
despise
,
or
hate
,
For
the
vain
glare
of
useless
wealth
or
state
.
The
most
abandoned
prostitutes
are
they
,
Who
not
to
Love
,
but
Av'rice
fall
a
prey
:
Nor
aught
avails
the
specious
name
of
WIFE
;
A
maid
so
wedded
,
is
a
WHORE
FOR
LIFE
.
Ev'n
in
the
happiest
choice
,
where
fav'ring
Heav'n
Has
equal
love
,
and
easy
fortune
giv'n
,
Think
not
,
the
husband
gain'd
,
that
all
is
done
;
The
prize
of
Happiness
must
still
be
won
;
And
oft
,
the
careless
find
it
to
their
cost
,
The
Lover
in
the
Husband
may
be
lost
;
The
Graces
might
alone
his
heart
allure
;
They
and
the
Virtues
meeting
must
secure
.
Let
ev'n
your
Prudence
wear
the
pleasing
dress
Of
care
for
him
,
and
anxious
tenderness
.
From
kind
concern
about
his
weal
or
woe
,
Let
each
domestick
duty
seem
to
flow
;
The
HOUSHOLD
SCEPTRE
,
if
he
bids
you
bear
,
Make
it
your
pride
his
servant
to
appear
;
Endearing
thus
the
common
acts
of
life
,
The
Mistress
still
shall
charm
him
in
the
Wife
;
And
wrinkled
age
shall
unobserv'd
come
on
,
Before
his
eye
perceives
one
beauty
gone
:
Ev'n
o'er
your
cold
,
and
ever-sacred
urn
,
His
constant
flame
shall
unextinguish'd
burn
.
Thus
I
,
Belinda
,
would
your
charms
improve
,
And
form
your
heart
to
all
the
arts
of
Love
;
The
task
were
harder
to
secure
my
own
Against
the
pow'r
of
those
already
known
;
For
well
you
twist
the
secret
chains
that
bind
With
gentle
force
the
captivated
mind
,
Skill'd
ev'ry
soft
attraction
to
employ
,
Each
flatt'ring
hope
,
and
each
alluring
joy
;
I
own
your
genius
,
and
from
you
receive
The
rules
of
Pleasing
,
which
to
you
I
give
.